Somewhere along the line, we established that I'm the only person in the world who has ever had a kid turn 16, so I'm a regular pioneer this week, and you get to hear all about it.

So, if you had a kid turning 16, and getting a driver's license, what rules would you put in place regarding driving the first few weeks?

Are you in the, "Just drive, already" camp, or are you more of a, "Let's try this driving thing out near home, first, and work our way up" kind of person?

Inquiring minds want to know.

She also up and got herself a job at a church nursery on Sunday mornings, so I'm thinking I may become a, "Just drive, already" kind of person when 7:00 Sunday morning arrives, and she needs to go to work, but we'll see.

I predict we'll have a bit of trouble making the newly licensed member of the family understand that a license is permission to operate a vehicle, not permission to go anywhere desired at any time.

This will also probably be good for a, "Why did I think this was a big deal?" post sometime in the future, but many of you probably already know that.

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I'm trying to give you money, Internet.

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When my kids were younger, they had a habit of dilly-dallying in the car at school drop-off in the mornings.

And, well, let's just say that dilly-dallying is frowned upon in that line (rightly so), so I always took measures to make sure they were ready to get out of the car when we got to the front of the line.

I would get them to unbuckle their seat belts when we were a couple of car lengths away from the drop-off zone and put their backpacks on so they'd be ready to get out of the car quickly.

For no particular reason, I'd say, "Time to unbuckle, Chuckle.", and that just kind of stuck.

The older two are in high school, and as far as I know, Busy Dad doesn't say that to them when they all get to school, and Busy D. is actually pretty good at getting out of the car promptly, so I hadn't been saying anything since school started this year.

He must have missed it, because he asked me to say it the other day.

So, I said, "Since it's a new year, I'm going to tell you to, 'Unbuckle, Duckle.'"

He thought about this for a minute, and decided it would be a different saying each day:

"Monday will be 'Muckle', Tuesday is 'Tuckle', Wednesday is 'Wuckle'..."

You see where this is going, don't you?

"Thursday is 'Thuckle'..."

Me: *forehead to steering wheel for not heading this off sooner*

Now, you think he's going to say it unwittingly, and I'm going to be all, "Oh, they're so innocent, aren't they?"

"Friday will be...wait, naw, we can't say that...better say, 'Zuckle'"

Now, I can't decide if I'm bothered that my 8 year old knew why that was bad or impressed that he deviated from the obvious.

However, it's apparent that he's become "that kid".

You know, the one you didn't want your first born snowflake to interact with because he has "older siblings" and he just "knows too much".

I was trying to figure out what to write, when it occurred to me that I never follow up on stuff I've already written.

Oh, Internet, don't take it personally, I hardly ever follow up on anything.

I know, it's cute how I think anyone is still reading here when we need to be marketing to each other on Twitter, but here ya go, anyway:

Busy Boy's eye/face looks much better. The medicine is really helping, and I don't think he's going to be too deformed.

He fared much better than Busy Girl did with this same leprosy (kidding) because he can take the medicine for it, and she was allergic to most of it.

Leave it to Busy Girl to have neither shin splints nor a stress fracture in her leg.

The MRI showed a "stress reaction" which is basically a stress fracture waiting to happen.

That's actually sort of good news as it doesn't require 10 weeks off as we originally thought.

She's in a boot, and the plan is for her to wear the boot during the day (it helps), and go back to practicing Tuesday so she can play this week.

That may or may not be a variation of sorts on what the doctor said to do, but, she needs to play for lots of reasons (if you're new here, I swear I'm not "that" parent) and we'll just see how it goes.

Busy D. is still in one piece except for allergies, so there's that.

Going back a little further, we're still working on the teen allowance thing.

We went with USAA Youth Banking, and it's been great.

She has both a checking and a savings account, and I can see all her transactions through my account. It has all kinds of great tools to use, and it even categorizes expenditures, so she can see where her money is going.

She can get her balance, etc. with her phone, and I can make transfers to her with my phone.

That's come in handy more than once when she's been somewhere unexpected and needs money.

Really? Sigh.

No, I have no affiliation with them, it's just what we, you know...chose, and I thought I'd share.

Anyhooters...

We opted to give her an allowance twice a month to mimic payday (woe unto her if she gets a salaried job someday and gets paid only once a month. I'm 45 and still can't manage it very well) and have encouraged her to put some of it in savings, but that part hasn't really happened, yet.

We are on the verge of having to decide about how to handle gas money as she is 9 days away from being 16.

(Next, y'all will have to listen to me stress about when and where we're going to let her drive as I'm quite sure I'm the first person in the history of the world to have a kid turning 16.)

We'll probably go with Cheryl's fabulous idea (in comments here) of making an initial deposit, and requiring a gas receipt to get more money put in.

Hopefully, that will help her to learn to budget money for gas and not blow it all at Smoothie King.

Or not. Hard to say.

(Hi, Busy Girl! Hi, Diva!)

But, the gas money topic is moot-ish until we figure out what she's going to drive.

(No, Busy Girl, there really isn't a secret update about a car that I'm going to share with the Internet and not you, sorry.)

Great Appliance Failure - Late Summer 2010 update:

Lawnmower - still screwed (drowning. in. grass.)

Dryer - "air dry" setting better be saving us money

Burglar alarm - probably ought to turn in back on, can't remember what the problem is, actually.

Downstairs HVAC - probably needs freon, but it's nearly 20 years old, you have to speak to it nicely as it's held together by good intentions and duct tape

Home wifi: not a failure, just particular. It doesn't get along with our cordless phones, and it only reaches where it feels like reaching since we live in an old house.

It's kind of a bully, actually.

Maybe ATT will swoop in and offer to rewire our whole house, and I'll document it.

It could happen.

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If you need me, I will be in one health care establishment or the other.

It started with my father's heart cath right before BlogHer.

No, wait. I work in a health care facility, it starts there every day.

I left town again at the end of last week, and came home to Busy Boy with a raging infected abscess near his eye.

Why yes, that does sound familiar, it was one of these.

For reasons longer than you care to hear about, I didn't actually see him until around 11:30 pm on Saturday night, so we took a trip to the ER as it was getting worse.

They threatened to keep him, but he ended up being discharged, and is much better today.

Poor kid, he just started high school last week, but at least they've already taken school pictures.

Today, Busy Girl had to go to the orthopedist for some leg pain.

It's either raging shin splints or a stress fracture.

We went from the MD office to the MRI place, and should have results tomorrow.

She'd appreciate some good thoughts, as a fracture would possibly be a volleyball season ender for her.

Busy D. is the only one we haven't broken, yet.

But, his soccer season is still early.

He had his first games with his travel soccer team yesterday, and I have to say that so far (other than the heat of Hades out there), it's what we were looking for.

All we ask from it is that he gets to be with other kids who are there to play the game like he is.

They played great, especially for only having had one practice, and more importantly, he's met his match in the games, which will hopefully be a little eye opener for him.

*****

And, because you've just come to expect it around here:

The Great Appliance Failure - Late Summer 2010

Lawnmower - (check)
Burglar alarm - (check)
Dryer - (check)
Downstairs HVAC unit (check)

Fun fact: it only takes about 2 days to dry a load of clothes by using the "air dry" setting.

Another fun fact: Our wifi only reaches my side of the bed if I lean way back.

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I never know how or if I should re-cap BlogHer, since like someone said, if you were there, you already know what happened, and if you weren't there, you likely don't care what happened.

Yet, I spent 4 days there, so I feel like I should say something, so you get bullets:

- I lost my credit card between work and the airport. Yes, the credit card I needed to get into the hotel. Why yes, I was a mess.

- Re: hotel dilemma? Internet? You were terrific. People from all over offered me the use of their card for my hotel deposit.

You guys are alright for a Series of Tubes, ya know?

- I did get into the hotel, and after a terrible day, the Wafels and Dinges truck was like a vision from Heaven.

- Seriously. Waffles. From a truck. In the street in the middle of the night. (mad, mad props to Mommy Needs a Cocktail)

- I love New York. I had only been one other time, and now I "get" it. I can't wait to go back.

- Was I supposed to say, "I 'heart' New York? Well, I didn't. "Heart" isn't a verb.

- I visited a farm, and got to know other bloggers a bit better in the back seat of a Chevy.

- Why are you looking at me like that?

- I got to meet so many new people, and visit with old friends, yet like many, I feel like there were a ton more that I didn't get to see.

- I got to see Gavin DeGraw perform right in front of me (even though this may be entering Creepy Old Lady Territory, he is adorable!)

- I got to ride in a New York City ambulance in the middle of the night.

- Two days after BlogHer, I'm still so tired I can't see straight.

- Really? You want to know about the whole ambulance thing?

I'll let my SaveHer '10 Associate tell the story:

I may or may not write more about it later, but seriously, can't hold head up any longer.

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I'm off to New York for BlogHer a little later today.

I'll try to leave a few pictures for you as I go, but I usually end up screwing it up, or I forget to take pictures.

Check back for some more from the weekend, if I get it right.

If I don't get it right, then here, look at my suitcase.

Even if you really don't care where I am (shut up), be sure to go share a funny story about fitness for a chance to win a $150 Visa gift card from the nice folks at The Laughing Cow.

Also, find out about Keeping It Simply Smooth at BlogHer10.

My dad's heart cath went well, they didn't find anything new in there, but they also didn't find anything to explain a coule of weird symptoms he's had off and on.

Thank you all for your kind words and the support on Twitter.

It's been a long day.

It was pretty cool, they did the cath through his radial artery in his wrist (as opposed to his groin).

Much easier recovery even though he did try to bleed to death when they loosened the pressure bandage.

OK, maybe not to "death", but he did bleed, and it did get me out of my groggy stupor, but at least we were in the hospital when it happened.

He lives alone, so I stayed over there until a couple of hours ago since he has to remember not to use that arm.

I even made him practice dialing the phone while holding pressure on his arm in case it were to bleed again.

OK, I'm so tired, I can't even tell you my name, and I'm literally trying to hold my head up to type this.

Oh, wait, I do know my name.

Thank goodness I have it written at the top of my website.

Trying to think of what's going on around here to write about, without saying, "Gah! Busy!"

Because, lately, that's kind of all I say.

The next couple of weeks are out of control, and just as I was trying to get a grip on them, my dad up and needs a heart cath.

We're not entirely sure why, but he went ahead and scheduled it like the nurse said to do, and we'll just ask questions later.

No, we're not morons, I can go into more detail if you'd like, I just thought I'd summarize it for you.

I'm a giver like that.

I suppose it wasn't urgent since no one seemed really worked up over when he should have it.

But, it's now the day before I leave for BlogHer.

Of course, it is.

And, that day, Busy Dad has to work, Busy Girl has volleyball (will this child EVER be old enough to drive? One month from Sunday.), and Busy D. had soccer practice and games 45 minutes away.

Other than the obvious fact I don't want anything to be wrong, we need to pray that he doesn't have to have a stent placed (or, yikes, surgery) because then he'll have to spend the night.

Did I mention I leave for New York that next day and he lives alone and I have no siblings?

That Wednesday was already comical because everyone but Busy D. has school obligations that day?

He's 8. While I'm sure I could leave him a debit card and Domino's phone number, the law kind of frowns on leaving him alone.

Evidence of him being able to take care of himself, though: he kicked my arse in a putting contest the other night (for real), and apparently, I was so bad he considered it a golf lesson and invoiced me for his time.

Apparently, he is serious, because I've gotten 2 overdue notices costing me $13, each.

Anyway, mind scrambled.

Busy Boy comes home from camp Saturday, and will immediately (as in that day) have to work on his summer reading paper because he starts school Wednesday.

You can imagine how that will play out since he can be rather pig-headed and he's been away from home for 3 weeks.

Blah, blah, blah...

Heh, now I sound like Ke$ha.

Speaking of Ke$ha, this just makes me laugh and laugh:

Glozell is big in our house, I love her.

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I have been meaning to get that last whiny post off the top for, uh 5 days now.

It did, however lead to my losing my "meet for coffee" virginity.

Since then, I have met Cheryl AND Laura for coffee.

OK, Laura and I both had iced tea if you want to get all technical about it, but we still "met for coffee", and I'm sticking to it.

But still...friends I can see and touch!

I think I'll make this a regular thing.

I will travel all over the country meeting other bloggers for coffee.

Why didn't anyone think of this before? I am brilliant.

I think will call it Busy Mom's (No) Tea Tour, it'll be the talk of the Internet.

Alright, you got me. There's no way I can go without iced tea.

I think my next tour stop will be in New York in a couple of weeks, I wonder if I can find anyone there?

Yes, I am going to BlogHer.

Every year, I feel bad if I talk too much about it here since there is always some BlogHer fatigue leading up to it, and most certainly afterward.

But, that's what I'm doing, and I'm looking forward to it, so I may tell you about it.

However, I may also tell you about brushing the dogs and getting so much hair that I made a 4th dog out of it.

Hard to tell what you'll get over here.

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This month really needs to be over.

I want to relish summer and the warm nights and sunny days, but for lots of reasons, this month is mostly just a prelude to school starting in about 2 weeks.

Things are a bit nuts, but you can't really admit to it because it's the lazy, hazy crazy days of summer.

Part of it is having a high school athlete that doesn't drive, yet. There's a whole lotta practice going on, and sometimes more than once a day.

If you have young kids, you can vow that you'll never be like us, and summer will always be sacred, relaxing etc.

But, fact is, you will be me someday, there's just the potential for more going on in their lives when they get older. It's mostly a good kind of crazy, though.

Still, this month has been weird, and it's time to move on.

Today is the 4th anniversary of my mother's death.

I never quite know what to say or do on this day.

We're not really grave visitors, though I suppose my dad could have gone today, and I didn't know it.

Most of you have learned over the years that he is a man of few words, so I can't really find out how he's "feeling".

So, I usually call about other stuff, and test him out.

Today seemed good enough, so I left the topic alone.

I say this every year, but it's hard to believe it's been 4 years.

I remember many parts of that day very distinctly, and other parts not so much.

If you've never had someone close to you die, the whole thing (at least for me) is a bizarre combination of feeling like they've gone forever with a side of feeling like they didn't really go anywhere.

Yeah, I know. I thought it was dumb when people said that, too, but whadya know? It is kind of like that, after all.

Just when you thought my jet lag was fatal, I'm back.

I know I've said this a lot, but I swear it didn't used to be this hard to blog about stuff.

Maybe I'll try to fix that.

I'll just write about whatever comes to mind, and I won't worry boring you.

I say that a lot, too.

So, here we go...

This week has been a little distracting what with Busy Girl's volleyball season gearing up, and Busy Boy going off to camp.

As for volleyball, it's the school season coming up. I don't get to go to those practices, so, my digital dumplings, you'll be spared the blow by blow of my boredom, unlike club season.

She's excited, but finds herself in a unique situation that she wasn't expecting, so she is going to have to work extra hard, and she has a bit of a load on her shoulders.

In other sporting news, Busy D. had his first indoor soccer game the other day.

If you're not familiar with indoor, it's kind of like hockey. It's fast paced and a lot of fun, he loved it.

He played goalie a lot, and obviously the coach did not follow my directive of "No Busys in the Goal."

You see, both Busy Girl and Busy Boy played goalie at the same time, so I was the mother of the goalie for many years.

I am done.

No Busys in the Goal.

I even taught Busy D. to say that when he was very small, but I guess it didn't work.

Also up for Busy D. is his first season of travel soccer.

Yes, we are those people with an 8 year old in travel sports.

It's a place I never thought we'd be, but here we are.

It's not because we think he's a prodigy, or that we are going to retire on his mad professional skillz after a full ride to college or anything.

This kid has a passion for soccer, and (at least for right now), he is very good at it. He's played rec soccer since he was 3, and we were running out of people he could play with.

He's not very big, so it wouldn't have been wise to move him up to the next age group, though he had to be moved up to the middle school group at soccer camp so he wouldn't hurt the little kids.

I know it's fashionable to declare that your kids all stay home and play with an unstructured block of wood or something, but we've never had a one with this kind of passion for anything before, and we feel like we need to give him the chance to really learn it, and put him with kids who are there to play the game like he is

We'll see how it goes.

In news that actually matters, one of my kids has a friend that's been diagnosed with a potentially life-threatening illness.

The whole thing has just consumed me. I cannot imagine.

I really need to get myself together, though, because I don't know the family all that well, and am afraid I may flail on the ground and wail the next time I see them, and that would be awkward, I suppose.

I finally bought my plane ticket to BlogHer, so I won't have to drive to New York from here after all.

I hate buying plane tickets.

It's not that I don't know how, I just always second guess myself about prices, times, routes, etc. and I wallow in indecision.

It's much easier when people do it for me, and I just fly when my ticket says.

I'm ready for BlogHer. It's time to get away and relax with thousands of my closest friends.

Speaking of friends, I've (still) never "met anyone for coffee".

You know how people with actual friends they can see are always 'meeting for coffee"?

I've never done that.

I've also never "savored" a bowl-sized cup of coffee with both hands like you see in all the stock photos of "women" and "moms", because that's totally how we drink it.

I feel cheated on both accounts, really.

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