Hi, I'm a [airquotes] Mommy Blogger[/airquotes].
I thought my face was going to pop off when I watched the big Today Show interview with Kathie Lee Gifford and the lovely bloggers, Mir, Jill, Kristen and Heather.
But, then I realized that it was actually a sinus infection and pink eye.
Oh, yes, I'm really a five year old.
However, now that I think about it, I'm not sure which came first, my illness or that segment.
Busy.
Blah, blah, blah-biddy blah.
Am boring even myself with the litany of things that could be the answer to, "What have I been doing?"
Those of you without kids would be pondering how you'd get these few minutes of your life back if I wrote about it.
Those of you with young kids would be thinking, "Wow, I'm glad I'm not that old", and, "I just can't relate", with a side of, "My kids won't ever have that much to do because I don't believe in organized activities."
To the above: Think what you will, but, insane scheduling happens anyway as they get older, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.
Those of you with grown kids would be all, "Buck up, it's only grade school", or, "HA! Better you than me."
With that, we are still buried in end of the year school activities and sports interspersed with the handing out of $20 bills here and there for "thank you gifts" for teachers, coaches, janitors, crossing guards, baristas, dog-walkers, cashiers, ice-cream scoopers, the lady in the corner over there and Lord only knows who else.
I want a roll of twenties packaged like Post-It Notes where they kind of stick to each other and pop up as you need them.
Busy Girl is also rapidly racking up "lasts" of her grade school career, with the last actual school day for her this Thursday.
The volleyball tournament was last night, we finished a somewhat disappointing third.
It was also the last time she'd wear a sports uniform for her school.
If you've been with me for a while, you know that marks the end of a lot of of sports, too.
Even though there's so much ahead of her, I'm still finding it hard to process how 9 years of school has gone by for her when I remember where I sat, what I was wearing and who we talked to when we went for her kindergarten screening test.
We have two other children and I think I'm going to be able to stop and appreciate their grade school years a little more now that I'm at this point with Busy Girl.
I'll shut up about all this eventually because there's no rest for the wicked.
The next two weeks will bring a host of events and weird schedules for everyone, and it will continue from there as the boys will be home with Busy Dad all summer and we'll have a teenager on the move and she'll back in school right away.
She's going to take a high school course this summer to get it out of the way so that she'll have a study hall in the fall.
And, I'm suspicious the ride just gets faster from there.
The only other thing I have to report is that I just overheard a job interview going on at the next table where a lady told the interviewer that she'd need a week to drive to California to do some sort of work that would be required of the job because she is "way too scared" to fly anywhere.
He said he'd "be in touch."
Oh, and I have a few new Flickr pictures and a contest going on to win a $100 Lands' End gift card.
I didn't see the Kentucky Derby today, but I just saw the news about them having to put down second place winner Fifty Eight Belles, and it's just completely heart-breaking.
If I had something witty to say, it'd go here.
The end of the school year is kicking mah ass.
But, (butt?) at least I have my fancy new camera to record my ass-kicking.
Busy Girl's team advanced in the volleyball tournament tonight, she's got 2 basketball tournaments coming up, both boys play soccer, there's field trips, projects, exams, house guests coming.
You know what all that means, don't you?
I'm poorer and it's getting in the way of me wasting time on the Internet.
Two weeks from Saturday, my oldest baby will graduate from the only school she's ever known.
Then? She'll be in high school.
Nine years goes fast, my friends. It really, really does.
I don't care if they are six. You signed up? You show up.
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You're right, he is the least blonde in the family.
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Do not wear that again.
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No, I think not. I don't even have one and I'm not getting you one.
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Did you catch it?
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Hold on there mister, I meant to give you a twenty. Give me that back.
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It was a bad day in Whoville.
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This one is loaded.
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How did you get in here?
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You promise you told your parents you're with me? Then why is there someone yelling at you on the other end of your phone?
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I'm not a poor sport. You are a poor loser.
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Hold your balls, ladies.
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Argh. You are like the Rainman.
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Tomorrow?!
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We can do it with three, that's fine with me.
OK., I may be a little behind the times since I hadn't seen this before, but my love for Meatloaf is well documented.
And a ATT Go Phone commercial with Meatloaf AND Tiffany?
Bonus.
I was talking to Busy Girl and her friend about the Miley Cyrus green bra MySpace pictures (though I don't think some of the are her).
We were reviewing the fact that you shouldn't do anything that would be bad if it ended up on the Internet because the Internet is forever.
You know the drill.
I also pointed out that Miley Cyrus has a bigger obligation than other people to make sure things like that don't happen because she is a public figure.
Busy Girl: "Yeah, little kids look up to her."
Me: "I know. Can you imagine if Busy D.'s favorite character was Hannah Montana and we had to explain that to him?"
Busy Girl: "It'd be like Sponge Bob pole dancing and dropping his squares."
Coffee of the Day: Hansen's Natural Cane Soda in Pomegranate
Listening to: Radio Margaritaville
Today's Mental Jukebox Selection: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Cursing: My Internet connection.
Giving away: SanDisk Gator Cruzer Flash drives at both Career and Kids and GenBetween.
E-mail spam subject line of the day: Get a bigger copulation organ today.
That'd have to be a heck of an organ to have room for two (or more?) people to get on it and do that.
Reading: My to-do list.
Wanting: (Besides a 300mm lens) A Chumby. In Latte.
Writing: a new post at Around the Watercooler on Mommytrackd.
Wondering: Why don't people ever RSVP to anything anymore?
Busy D. is having his first birthday party ever (shut up) and I have no idea who's coming and it matters for this particular party.
People.
"RSVP" means "Répondez s'il vous plaît" or, "Please Respond".
That means, tell the host "yes" or "no".
I even gave them an e-mail option, too so they don't even have to pick up the phone.
Gah.
Wow, I haven't been here in a few days. I never do that.
I would say that I have "nothing to say", but then I'd be setting myself up for all you smart-asses out there with you variations of, "And? What else is new?"
So, I won't say that I've had nothing to say.
With that, I will proceed to rock the Mommyblogger stereotype and tell you that it's been a busy weekend with kids' sports and overnight guests.
Busy Girl has had a lot of volleyball lately. They're doing OK and have learnved lots of stuff from an excellent coach.
However, as usual, I remind myself why I don't coach kids' sports because sometimes they make my head asplode.
Any team that I coached would probably deserve a coach with a head, so I mostly stay out of it.
Except for the line judge thing.
Apparently, I am the only volleyball line judge this side of the Mississippi River.
It's a volunteer thing, you don't have to be anyone special to do it, yet I am the only one who will do it.
I did 10 games, on Saturday morning. Two of which I had no kid in the game.
It was quite the feat also, because I had Busy D. with me, and, well, the last time I had him with me and was a line judge (I almost wrote "did lines" and that would probably be how rumors get started) the referee had to stop the game because of him.
He left his spot with me knowing there wasn't a darn thing I could do about it, and the 2 adults that were supposed to be watching him, were you know, not watching him.
Busy Boy had an 8am soccer game, and since Busy Dad was taking a class and since I'm the only line judge in the entire volleyball league, my dad had to take him to his game.
My poor dad. He is not a big soccer fan, it was about 36 degrees and the game was 40 minutes away.
But, he did it because that's what grandfathers are supposed to do, though I think I used up my soccer "pass" with him for the season.
Busy Girl joined an AAU basketball team this weekend.
Or, at least we think she did.
She was supposed to play on a spring team, and they didn't have enough players, so the team never happened, but there was a 7th grade with players mostly from her schoo (she's an 8th grader).
She is planning to try out for basketball next year in high school, and needs all the practice she can get, so this was a disappointment.
However, over the weekend, we found out that the 7th grade team might need more players even though the season is well underway, so I called the coach Friday night.
After talking to him and deciding that I don't speak "rural basketball coach" very well, I established that she could come to the tournament that they were palying in the next day and sit on the bench (Saturday).
I couldn't tell from what he said if that meant he had room for her on the team or not, so I asked.
He replied, "Wellll, how's she gonna know what to do if she don't come watch?"
Alrighty.
So, we bolted from volleyball on Saturday morning (I guess I left them line-judgeless or someone finally stepped up, but 4 hours was my limit), ran by McDonald's and went to basketball.
She had on sandals, but put her volleyball shoes on at the last minute, so the coach would at least think she looked somewhat athletic.
He called the team over, spoke to them a while and then they all, incuding Busy Girl (who, remember hasn't touched a basketball in well over a month), went on the court to warm up.
The game started, and I was just doing my spectator thing since they pay guys in stripes to watch the lines in basketball.
The assistant coach had a clipboard and was talking to Busy Girl, I guess showing her plays.
A little while into the game, I see Busy Girl get up and go to the scorer's table.
Um, yeah.
He put her in the game, volleyball shoes, no jersey and full of McDonald's.
She did fairly well, but the look on the face of the girl who Busy Girl went in for was priceless.
Yes, that last sentenece was a prepositional train wreck. Shut up.
Not only was the girl surprised to come out of the game, she was all like, "Who are you?" when Busy Girl ran up to her.
At one point, he tried to put Busy Girl in at point guard, but she politely reminded him that she had no idea when he would want her to call which play since she's never been to a practice because she joined the team about a half-hour ago.
He agreed and she played guard.
She played in the game on Sunday, and had a jersey that time, but we're still unclear if she's on the team. We'll see what happens.
She took a fall in the first game, and fractured her tailbone, I think.
She didn't want to tell him, so she's been playing, but she has volleyball today and her coach might not be happy if she finds out Busy Girl broke her butt at basketball.
Don't tell anyone, OK?
It's our secret.
From the "That is Just Too Weird" department: Busy Dad (not my husband) has a young man who turned 6 yesterday, too!
Oh, and Jay has no idea how dangerous it is to be around me in April.
Today is the 10th Anniversary of the tornadoes that hit downtown (has sound) in the middle of the day.
It's hard to describe, but that was a day like no other for me, and I'm sure for many others as well.
April 15th.
Not only is it Tax Day for America, it's also a special day at our house.
You see, six years ago today, I met someone new. How was I to know he'd end up being a blogger since I didn't even know what blogging was then?
Yes, your favorite former blogger, Busy D. is six years old!
Six years ago, I woke up in the middle of the night with the weirdest feeling I've ever had.
It seemed the human that was supposed to be surgically removed from my body the next morning was ready to come out.
I have c-sections for a reason, this was so not in the plan.
So, off to the hospital we went.
We called my parents on the way, but of all times, their phone had somehow gotten knocked off the hook and they were unreachable.
Many of you know that my dad at least, has enough cell phone issues, so that wasn't an option.
The admitting office of the hospital was confused as to why I was reporting in so early for my scheduled procedure, but it was made crystal clear to the young lady when I had a contraction at her desk.
Turns out they can move kinda fast there, after all.
The staff hooked me up to the monitors, pronounced it was a girl based on the heart rate and some other voodoo.
The anesthesiologist came in and I pissed him off because I wouldn't give him my weight out loud and I asked for his clipboard to write it in myself.
He did, however get me back when he was giving my epidural.
He went a little fast when he was injecting the medicine and I apparently dropped my blood pressure and I got his attention when I started seeing dead relatives and was sure I was circling the drain (medical types will get that).
A little bit of Narcan later we were good to go to the OR even though my doctor wasn't there.
I was a little concerned that the nice, um very "earthy" Birkenstock-clad lady was going to try to perform my section "naturally" so I'd be a real woman, but my fears were unfounded.
Three OR tables later we were underway.
Yes, the first two tables didn't work, and there was actual talk of someone running out to Home Depot.
Non-working tables were very significant to the poor souls who had to move my paralyzed heft from one place to another multiple times.
Anyway, Busy D. was born without incident (Nurses: "A boy? Really?") and the nice earthy lady said her goodbyes.
This concerned me a great deal since I was pretty sure I was still open.
Then, like a Jack in the Box or something, my doctor popped up from behind the screen.
Total freakiness in my drug-induced state, maybe you had to be me then.
Anyway, birth story, birth story...blah blah blah...
Busy D. is six, hard to believe, but I can't imagine life any other way.
http://WWW.busymom.net/mt/mt-tb.cgi/3823
I blame Kathie Lee.
Or maybe it was all that yapping on the phone you mommys tend to do.
Gag.
I'd totally blame Kathie Lee.
Thanks for posting the link. I kept meaning to go find it but you saved my lazy butt from doing it!
Kathie Lee...
I rarely say mean things about anyone but she was a crappy person to interview anyone talking about something in this century. (Is it just me or is she so 80's? And not in a good way.) She acted like she was going to get cooties from Heather. Poor Heather, I can only imagine what she was thinking as they started promoting the next segment like that.
Another vote for Kathie Lee. She needs to get off my tv, now.
What she said was unbelievable. Someone send that woman a note informing her we are in the 21st century now. She has teenage kids--don't they educate her on these things?
seriously, I felt the same way. KLG is not a smart woman in my book....
I cannot believe The Today Show has added her to their interviewing line up. She was over when she left Regis. She has no idea what she is talking about. She's beyond ridiculous. And ignorant.
She is totally to blame for your infection. Feel better soon.
Well, according to Kathie Lee, it very well have been your computer. They ARE scary AND evil, you know!
How awesome to click hear and see this because I hardly ever watch any of the morning shows anymore and I read yours and Mir's blog everyday so it was cool to see her there. Heather did an awesome job and was so sweet and gracious in the face of such a ditz.
She is sickening, isn't she?
Kathie Lee just doesn't get it.
It was unreal. You do know Kathie Lee has a problem with computers, don't you? And that Heather is "reviled by everyone" ? I was stunned when 'The Today Show' hired her. I'm stunned every time she opens her mouth. What a tool. I didn't think the other reporter did a very good job with the other bloggers either....why do they treat you all like there's something wrong with you or you're trying to pull a fast one? Very strange. They should talk to your legions of fans. That would be eye-opening.
Kathy Lee Gifford= Idiot
Me watching KLG on the Today show= Brain bleeding out my ears
I already had a suspicion that the Today Show hired KLG just so maybe they could get Katie Couric back -- that Katie could take "getting rid of KLG for us" as an excuse to leave CBS News.
Now I remember why I never watched Regis and Kathie Lee. UGH!
We don't watch Kathie Lee -- does that mean we got it from YOU?
My three have been sent home from school this week with pinkeye :( fun fun!
For someone who continually talked about and showed pictures, video, etc., of her kids virtually from conception, KLG had a lot of nerve pushing the "Leta" issue with Heather. Kathie Lee has become even more irrelevant that I previously thought possible. Oh, and the pink eye - most definitely her fault!!
It gave me a cold sore.
Ironic isn't it that this is the same woman who shared every possible revolting detail about her children with us and SHE looks down her nose at Heather?
Kathie Lee of all people worries about protecting the privacy of children? She blabbed way more, on TV, everyday reaching an audience of MILLIONS. Wow. Wow.